Comparison the thief of joy

Lets talk about Mum guilt. Before I had kids, it was just a phrase to roll my eyes at. After I had kids, it became  something I lived with daily. Before I had kids, I was quite simply care free and rarely felt guilty about anything. Since I’ve had kids Its become a routine to feel mum guilt…

Comparison is the thief of joy. We are all guilty of it. We see instagram perfect mummy’s who look like that they have their stuff together and the guilt sets in.

I didn’t spend enough time playing with the kids.

I didn’t get the house clean because I was playing with the kids.

I read with my oldest much more often than I read with the younger two.

I’m not strict enough. I’m too strict.

I don’t plan enough activities for the kids to do. So I need to Pinterest the hell out of life now.

I should be happy all the time because I get to stay home with my kids and other mums would kill to be in my situation.

I have found since having children that mothers can be the worst at comparing, them selves and of others. Even down to mums shaming new mums saying 'you shouldn't be bottle feeding, breast is best' down to 'oh i wouldn't breast feed in public'  I mean seriously who cares how a baby is fed as long as the baby is being fed right ? Are we not all on the same team ?

Then there is the mums who say 'oh your a stay at home mum? you've got it easy, what do you do all day? then the others 'I don't know how you can go back to work and leave your babes'  Im like 'ohhhh ok Mary chill your boots lovely you do what works for you im gonna do works for me' and all that jazz.  Life would be that bit easier if people were a little less judgy because in reality most mums do not have a scooby doo what they are doing. There is no instruction manual on parenting. No right or wrong way to bring your cherubs up. We are all just trying to do the best we can.

So now I have to learn let go of the guilt and simply accept that I’m not perfect. Then when I do that and stop comparing I can focus on the most important thing of loving my kids.